Beth and Jim*

Ever get that sense when you meet someone you feel like you’ve known them for ages?

Beth and Jim are what I like to term a cracking couple. They’re super easy going, team players, genuinely interested in others, down to earth and good fun.

Beth is a delight. She is warm, astute, quick and gracious. I first met her when a group of us headed off to Bowral for Christmas in July one weekend. Beth and her partner Jim had kindly agreed to give me a lift there after meeting at a designated meeting point in West Sydney. We finally connected, despite the challenges of a broken blender and an Uber driver so determined to promote her Sodastream business that we missed a significant turn-off. Beth welcomed me with open arms despite my being an hour late and sporting a half-cooked vegetarian lasagne down my front.

Jim I first met at an ANZAC day event. I liked him instantly, so much so I entrusted him with $20 to bet on two-up. He lost, but the trust garnered remains. He is a jovial personality with an open, happy face. Having once dated an IT consultant (whatever that means) I’m sceptical of men who do maths and their ability to communicate. Harsh? Yes. True? Quite possibly**. Jim is an exception to the theory. He can communicate, and does so very well. He also has a high EQ. So much so I’d love to work for him because just gets people and has this ability to break down difficult concepts in a way that can be understood by the general masses.

How they met is a wonderful story and the impetus for this column. They matched on Tinder over a two-week window in the UK. Beth recalls Jim was her fist Tinder date. She moved from NZ to London in February 2017 after finding herself newly single and was encouraged by a friend to try the App. After some hesitation she thought she’d give it a go. Jim meanwhile flew to the UK for a friend’s wedding and was supposed to fly out again a week later but on the day of the nuptials his dad had a mild heart attack requiring surgery. A mutual swipe right, a connection made and the rest is history.

What followed was a whirlwind dating program that packed a month’s worth of courtship into one week. Drinks one night, Ludovico Einaudi open air concert another, a mid-week sojourn to Paris (Amsterdam was also considered), culminating in an agreement to say ‘see you soon’ (or à bientôt I would’ve thought), rather than ‘good-bye’. Beth: “Sounds like a terrible Craig David song, doesn’t it?” Who would’ve thought so many sliding doors could have led to this outcome.

They don’t muck around either. Six weeks before returning to NZ, Beth says that Jim flew her to Sydney where he was based at the time. His reasoning was he had to points to use, but Beth later discovered this was really a code to mask his generosity, one he has used on family and friends before. Jim has now joined Beth in New Zealand, where she has recently gained residential status. While they have different skillets they work in the same sector. Beth develops tender bids for an engineering firm, a significant role given the $$’s and opportunities at stake. After spending a weekend with Beth I personally reckon she’d make a great Intelligence Officer. She has an eye for detail, is a good judge of character and doesn’t seek the limelight. Jim works at another engineering firm, doing what he does best, dealing with people and managing complex projects.

You might think ‘you couldn’t script it’. However, Jim describes the movie The Big Sick as the closest on-screen synopsis of their romance. A quick check-in with madam Google reveals the critics’ consensus as ‘funny, heartfelt and intelligent’. I know it’s not Jim’s point, the crux of the movie, aside from dealing with cultural issues, is a whole series of mishaps and coincidences that leads to the couple ending up together. But I cannot but help but returning to those three words. I think they capture them so well.

In the car as we head to Bowral (with the fauna strapping on the boots and limbering up on the sidelines), the couple recount their holiday in Central America last year. As they were crossing border between Mexico and Belize it turned out the guide had issues with her passport and at the crossing entrusted everyone’s cash with Jim (with no two-up in sight). Problem arose when Jim was attending to the call of nature and the bus was set to depart. It was Beth who took control of the situation and handled the matter with deft prowess, while Jim returned to a rousing applause, the kind one reserves for an Aeroflot pilot upon landing.

It’s people like this couple that give me faith in humanity. They’re fun, they’re down to earth and you feel like you can pick up where you left off. I reckon we could go our own way, regroup in a couple of years and you’d still laugh about the one hour delay, real men and how bears sit AROUND caves as if happened last weekend.

It doesn’t take much to say start a conversation with someone and instil a sense self-worth so critical to a person’s emotional wellbeing. They do that both individually and together. It’s why they’re such a great team and why I admire them so much.

*Not their real name.

**I speak in jest but not really. My current housemate is a software engineer and a part time yoga instructor (thank you very much). He is also a considerate, witty, house colleague so hope prevails.